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Ok, agree with mk that playing dota sometimes will just piss you off straight away. Especially when you be the first to get killed, and you've just woke up 5minutes ago. You'll get so pissed till you wanna strangle somebody who is next to you to death. Got so freaked out today with all the games. Thanks to those "PRO" leavers.
I seriously need a hair cut now. It looks like a bird nest, especially when i woke up. =/ Saturday gonna be a rather busy day. Yeah. Be placing pool table outside bay again, then we can play! Hahaha. =) I wanna play pool, i wanna play pool, i wanna play pool!! =)
I'm freaking pissed with my sis right now. My laptop got so f**ked up thanks to her "clever" brain. She download some anti-virus thingy into my laptop, ending out my laptop got virus. Crappy isn't it? Oh well.
Baptism class was alright today, but its the last lesson. Sad.. Yeah. Supper at Mac then took a cab home. Borrowed from my cousin a comics series called "I'S", so nice lahz! Its all about girls tho. But still, the storyline was perfect. Great story.
Now my mind got all confused. And i couldn't get some sleep recently, insomia? No way. Oh well, perhaps i'm just thinking too much? And yes emily, i'm a cute retarded moo moo =)
Today i've managed to wake up in time for service. And i met MK at the bus stop near his house. Hahaha. MK is the joke of the day! So funny lahz. Haha. Wheeee~ Made me laugh none stop today. He is so cute lahz! Then slacked in bay. Watch youths playing TABOO! So noisy and funny! Yeah. Went to IT Fair at EXPO with Angela, Jia Zhi, Jowell and Zhe wei at evening. I like the IT Fair! So many things to buy! Haha. Sadly, i didn't buy anything. Either is i didn't bring enough cash with me or i need to save some money for present.
Going to queensway with emily tml to get present for somebody. Haha. Hope can get some clothes or jeans also. I'm short of jeans!!
Many thought came into my mind ytd. Yea. Alot alot of things. And i'm somehow troubled by it. Thinking too much i can say. Perhaps i need some rest =) Later maybe playing pool with aaron and yan shan! Hahaha. Hopefully can play with them today! I'm so bored and bored and bored now. Oh well, doing bay duty is always the same. =/
Happy Birthday Lynda! And i'm broke!! So no expensive present for you. Haha. I know you want that jeans very badly. Sorry! Perhaps next year =) Haha and stop asking for more and more expensive present!! =)
Went to east coast park and rollerblading in the rain! Hahaha. Its a once in a life time experience. Yea. Haha. Is like, the rain keep on pouring none-stop lahz! Till we cannot take it, we just walk to the shop and rent roller blade. 2Hours of blading! And i'm half dead. I am so so soooo like a old man now! ARGH!
Fine, just to clear things up. Sorry that i didn't reply your sms. And i have absolutely no idea what to reply you.
Okay! This gonna be my longest bitching composition so far. So whoever don't wanna hear me bitching. Sorry, pls go other sites =) Wheeee~ And i'm shocked! 5 POSTS WITHIN A DAY LAHZ! Hahaha. Didn't know how come i'll write all this crappy post.
Howie Day - Collide
Perhaps today wasn't a peaceful day after all. Its a day of confront, confess and rejection.
ARGHHH! Ytd didn't sleep one whole night to finish up the whole set of "Feng Shen Yan Yi". The comic so nice lahz!! wheeee~ Then went to church for service, thought i was late because i went out of my home at 8.30 but i make it just in time!! Haha. So nice of god. ^^
My mum cook today!! Chicken wing with martell. Yum Yum. SO NICE LAH! Should get my mum to cook more next time. Haha. I wanna eat steamboat!! Must find aaron, nicolas they all go eat together one day ^^
Kinda packed schedule for tml and sat. I had absolutely no idea what to do tml. Lynda wasn't free, oh well =( Staying over at Isaac house tml. And playing basketball on sat! Haha. Just nice can bath in church. Perfect! =)
Stop thinking and hesitating.
Take action.
Then played basketball at seng kang. Daniel called me. Sorry daniel, i didn't expect to see my friend there. But they are not bengs. Sorry for spoiling your mood. Oh well.
Cook my own spagetti for dinner today! Haha. I was like.. so proud of myself lahz! Wheeee~ But i add abit too much oil, and the tomato wasn't left that much. So basically the taste wasn't so nice. But i'm happy! Cause its without any help this time! Haha. =) Going for interview at popular tml. But why am i hestiating?
Took a cab and drop ChunAi, ChunHui and XiNing at my house cause i've got to rush down to SKMC to meet pastor! And i'm almost late! Hahaha, thanks god for the taxi uncle =)
Then after interview with pastor, he asked me to help him open the door of 3-1 for the baptism class! But actually he should be giving me 3-2 key! So funny lahz! He got confused all along. Funny. Today's baptism class is horrible. Only 3youths were present for the class. Me, angela and anthony. The 3 A's. Haha. Half way during the talk, angela was like so cold lahz! Then she asked me to tell pastor lek to off the aircon.
*me rising up my hand*
Pastor lek: Yes?
me: Sorry for the interuption, can switch off the aircon?
Pastor lek: Oh! Okay.
*Pastor lek off the aircon*
Pastor lek: Okay! That sounds like anouncement.
Blah! Whatever. Feel so paiseh. But still, even though the aircon was switched off. Angela hand was freezing. And she's like. Molesting me for the rest of the lesson? Oh well. Didn't catch what the pastor was saying most of the time. =/
Eh! Lynda u so materialistic one! Argh!! U're making me broke. Argh! Qi Si Wo Le Lahz!! Grrrr.. And HAPPY BIRTHDAY REBEKAH! I've almost forgotten your birthday. =p
Then went to bay straight away. I almost do one man show today lahz! Grrrr.. Luckily got sebastian and steven. LoLz. 3 Ic's work together so nice lahz! Fast and good =) Most relaxing sunday for me ever. Haha. But seriously.. Bay is getting more and more boring now. The only thing left is the computers and card games i guess. I'M BORED!!
Haha sandar! Good luck in finding your job! Regina and Angela too! Wheeee~
Hahaha. Had cell group as usual. We played mastermind for icebreaker!! Haha. Our cell group ended very early again! Concentration so fun lahz! Wheeee~ Next time should get sebastian to lead ice-breaker. He's full of funny ideas~ LoLz. Guess i'll be going for job interview for popular also. Better than slacking at home. Time to make myself useful =) Hahaha. Lazyiness is a sin!
Played billard again. And i still win einstein at a score of 7-6! Very close tho. Just 1 black ball and he will end up winning. Hahaha. =p I WANT TO GO FOR ROLLER BLADING!! SO EXCITED!! Haha. I'm going insane soon. =)
I'm sorry to drag you guys down with me also. Especially joe, deborah and michelle. Coz you guys didn't do anything. And you got to see sally becoz of me. Really sorry about it. Tomorrow roller blading was cancelled. Sad =( Meaning i'll be spending another day at home. I gonna get bored to death soon!
Oh! Chicken little the movie is kinda nice. The characters in the movie is so cute lahz!! Wheee~ Roller blading changed to next tuesday! So excited =)
I want to stop it already. No use talking about all this things anymore. I'm awake now.
Just one question, can we still be the same as last time after all these things? Normal friends, no more no less. Can we?
I'm truely sorry.
I'm just writing out what comes out of my mind, is it wrong? I've made everything clear in the first place. That post is a bitching post.
Whats the point of understand other people now? When i doesn't even feel that i've got friends all along. And those friends who i treasure most had left me. Its useless. And i don't want to understand people anymore.
I doesn't want to pick up a quarrel or something. Hope u get it right.
I've woke up. Have you?
Okay. I can't sleep now and i just remember that while i was sleeping today. I don't know is which youth leader called me to talk about the aloha chalet thingy. Haha okay, and i remembered that i told him/her to meet this tuesday 6pm. But i really FORGOT is who!! Hahaha. Die die. Well, confession time. Bringing wine to chalet is bad example to christians. But well, its a habit. I got to drink some before i can sleep peacefully. So sorry eh? Hard to change. Coz i love wine. =) I'm so damn sure that once my birthday passed, my house will always have at least 2 big class bottle of wine. And einstein, i didn't get drunk that day. Stop insisting that i've got drunk before. I'll never get drunk like xy can? I know my own limit.
Somebody asked me some interesting questions today. And its very interesting, "have u taken advantage of girls before?" Ahhh, what a nice question. Sorry yea, i'm a flirty but i won't take advantage of girls! By accident, only once. But just HUG someone after she got drunk okay! Nothing more nothing less. And do i look like someone who will take advantage of girls? I don't know. I really don't know. But AT LEAST i'm NOT LIKE SOME GUY WHO ALWAYS STICK WITH YOU AND TAKE ADVANTAGE OF YOU! WE ALL CAN SEE THAT CAN? ITS SO DAMN FREAKING OBVIOUS. For those who don't know who i am refering to. Too bad. Well, you asked, why am i so agitated isn't it? Know why? Because i didn't expecting anything from anyone. What i am doing all along is just doing what friends should do. I didn't expect you to come to me and tell me your problem yea? I just want you to know that if you really need someone, i'll be there, AS A FRIEND. And the main reason i got so agitated is because you asked me some ridiculous questions. Fine, i didn't expect anyone who knows me will understand me anyway. Till now, not even one knows what i dislike most. And that is lieing. WHEN YOU WILL BE LATE, JUST ONE CALL OR SMS WILL DO IT! WHEN U DISLIKE ME, JUST SAY! I don't even knows whats the point of lieing to me when i will forgive if you told me the truth. Telling the truth right from the start is much damn more better then finding it out myself isn't it? Damn it.
And i said that this will be the longest bitching composition isn't it? Yea, i haven't finish yet. Theres so freaking much things for me to say about! Okay, second thing. I know some of you guys out there doesn't like me. I showing off my money? Sorry, i tell you one thing. YOU GUYS OUT THERE ARE SO FREAKING HAVING A GOOD LIFE OKAY? WHAT ABOUT ME? MY PARENTS DIVORCED AND MY FAMILY DOESN'T EVEN LOOK LIKE A FAMILY! AND I'M NOT SHOWING OFF MY MONEY, YOU THINK I'M RICH? ONE DAY I NEED TO EAT THREE MEALS OUTSIDE AND MY DAILY ALLOWANCE IS JUST $10? HOW ABOUT YOU GUYS OUT THERE? YOUR ALLOWANCE MIGHT NOT BE AS MUCH AS ME, BUT THE LEAST YOUR FAMILY WILL COOK ISN'T IT? I CAN'T EVEN SAVE MONEY CAN? THE MOST I CAN DO IS TO SKIP MY MEAL TO SAVE MONEY! SO SHUT THE HELL UP WHEN YOU DOESN'T EVEN KNOW HOW I FEEL!!! YOU THINK I'M HAVING A GOOD LIFE EH? I HAVE A SCREWED LIFE CAN? I FEEL NO WARM AT HOME. I GOT FREEDOM, BUT COMPARING FREEDOM AND FAMILY, WHAT WILL YOU CHOOSE? DAMN IT! Okay, my second bitching IS NOT REFERING to anyone. If you get offended, sorry.
Okay, third thing. Its related to christians, so i need to declear something first. I AM A CHRISTIAN ALSO! What i'm saying is the truth, so don't get offended. Again, i'm not refering to anyone and if you have a feeling saying like you will get offended, pls go other sites now. Well, what is god's teaching? Love your neighbour as yourself, love you god with all your mind and all your heart and all you strength. Are we doing all this? Do we love our neighbour? I don't really think so. Do you really love god, mostly yes. But WHEN will you really depend on him? When you have problems and no people to rely on eh? And forget him the next minute after your problem solve isn't it? This called faithful christians? Think about it. We keep on saying, we must be a good testimonal for god. But are some of us obeying the law? Lets say smoking and drinking first. Some of us included me are drinking when we are below 18! Then smoking? So many smokers! I had to admit, in church christians are so "HOLY". Outside church, DEVILS! Bunch of Hypocrites! I'm one also. No doubt. We prayed for changes! But are we really sincere about it? Or we pray because other people are doing it so we follow? A advice, if you are not sincere in your prayer! THEN PRAY TO GOD TO CHANGE YOUR FAITH FIRST! If not, you are forever a hypocrite, no matter how much effort you put in trying to act as a faithful christian, you are one hypocrite. Okay i don't want to say about christians anymore, i'm starting to feel ashame of christians after writing all this.
Okay, last bitching paragraph! Wheeee~ Promise matters. How do you guys treat promises as? Seriously, its just a random sentance that comes out of your mouth isn't it? None of us treat it as something important. Promise.. Do you know what is promise!? It is only said when u truely mean it, not just a random sentance. Hope you guys out there understands. People expecially guys who only know how to make empty promises, better reflect yourself on this. People hates empty promises.
Well, i've finish my bitching today. Wheeeee~ Feel so much better after writing so many things. Going sleep now. Exams later =) One hour of writing the blog. Nice ^^
Well if you wanted honesty, that's all you had to say.
I never want to let you down or have you go, it's better off this way.
For all the dirty looks, the photographs your boyfriend took,
Remember when you broke your foot from jumping out the second floor?
I'm not okay (x3)
You wear me out
What till it take to show you that it's not the life it seems?
(I'm not okay)
I told you time and time again you sing the words but don't know what it means
(I'm not okay)
To be a joke and look, another line without a hook
I held you close as we both shook for the last time and take a good hard look!
I'm not okay (x3)
You wear me out
Forget about the dirty looks
The photographs your boyfriend took
You said you read me like a book, but the pages all are torn and frayed
I'm okay
I'm okay!
I'm okay now
(I'm okay now)
But you really need to listen to me
Because i'm telling you the truth
I mean this, I'm okay!
(Trust me)
I'm not okay
I'm not okay
Well, i'm not okay
I'm not o-fucking-kay
I'm not okay
I'm not okay
(Okay)
This is the song which i love most. And i think that it describe best what i'm feeling now. Well, i'm not okay and i'm not o-fucking-kay. To that certain people. I tell you what. I just treating you as normal friends all along okay? Thats how i treat people. Not because i want get attention or whatever. Hope you get it right. No more misunderstanding.
No people has ever truely understand me. Not even a little bit. Do i have anymore choice? Sad to say. No!
The dawn is breaking
A light shining though
You're barely waking
And i'm tangled up in you
Yeah
I'm open, you're closed
Where i follow, you'll go
I worry i won't see your face
Light up again
Even the best fall down sometimes
Even the wrong words seem to rhyme
Out of the doubt that fills my mind
I somehow find
You and i collide
I'm quiet you know
You make a first impression
I've found i'm scared to know i'm always on your mind
Even the best fall down sometimes
Even the stars refuse to shine
Out of the back you fall in time
I somehow find
You and i collide
Even the best fall down sometimes
Even the wrong words seem to rhyme
Out of the doubt that fills your mind
You finally find
You and i collide
You finally find
You and i collide
You finally find
You and i collide
This is just a song i like. Not refering to anything. Don't ever get the wrong idea.
Today's pastor is funny from the way he talk. He sounds so agitated lahz! I love the miracles that happened during service today. Reminds me on how god healed my cracked bone last year during One Camp. Such a great god lahz! I was so touched when i see how god do all this miracles to those people who is sick.
Then had bay meeting, and jerline was confused of the com password. Hahaha. Resulted in sally having to call anthony to get the password. So funny! LoLz. The meeting was short tho. 10minutes. Followed by going to pasa malam to buy food and went home to sleep. Such a peaceful day =)
Having IA and IF test tml. And i've forgot the script for tables. I'm screwed. -.-"
Then went to west mall with emily. EH! I wanna change ITE lahz! Bukit batok there got so many pretty girls!! Grrrr.. Ah well, then we went to jurong point shopping for something. Haha. We almost took the wrong mrt lahz! So FUN!! Wheeee~
Went down to church for cell after that. Today's cell so fun lahz!! Hahaha. Wheeeee~ so much laughter and joy. =) Played billard after that! Saw another pretty girl over there!! Wah Lao.. her skills are damn good lahz! Reached home and play dota. Craziest game i've ever played. 2hour 25minutes. Which is totally insane to those who have played dota before.
I gonna die now after all the rushing and playing and lack of sleep. Might not go church tml. Will see how.
After my class advisor called me today, i suddenly thought of the promise which i've made. Oh damn, i keep on saying "yeah yeah, don't worry." But now? Oh man. Crap. Why god made my heart as to treat promises as much as my life? Crappy isn't it? "Promise are meant to be broken", is this true? I highly doubt so when my mind is in innocent stages. After i started to step out into reality, i realised that promise is really something meant to be broken. When husband and wife get married, don't they made a promise saying they'll take care of eachother till they drop off dead? But WHY? Why now so many people getting divorced? Promise meant to broken? Crap.
Okay, i not going to continue bitching anymore. Why? Cause i don't want many people to know my life, my struggles. Why? Because when i truely sad, depressed, who can i think of? NONE! Sad isn't it? People might think they know me well because they have known me for years. But so damn sad to say, none understands me. Not even a single bit. They don't even know what i dislike even though they know me for like.. 4years? 5years? Funny eh? Yup! VERY FUNNY! Last thing, the things that i've wrote in this post is NOT referring to certain people. So don't get offended. Because blog is meant for us to write out what we think.
nice necklace isn't it!? =)
I've just remembered that i've forgot to thanks daniel again for the present! Its nice isn't it!? Thanks again for that.
Hahaha something so funny happened today when i went to market to buy dinner. Wheee~ I not gonna say it out tho. Cause its quite embrassing also. Haha. =p Can only say that the girl is really quite cute! Hehees. Fei He Ma don't say out ah! Bleahx!
Having Baptism class tml. Wondering if i can skip this lesson anot. Cause my knee is killing me =/ Ah well, god's plan. We'll see =)
Bay duty today, still the same as ever. BUSY! BUSY! BUSY! Awwww.. I'm so screwed =/
Went back home, and wash my stupid injury with dettol this time. So now my injury is bloody red now. Which makes me feel so sick whenever i look at it. =/ Hope to no need to see a doctor this time. Darn, i wanna buy jay's album!!
Cell group today. Perhaps keith was right, all of our belonging, wealth belongs to god. So it was right to give just 10% of our monthly allowence as offering to god. And been such a nice god, he didn't force us to give. He gave us a choice. Yup, learnt more new things today =)
Oh, just to make things clear to someone who i've send the sms to. I really mean what i say, not just trying to console you only, but i mean it. Because i care.
DOTA-ed! Hahaha, so fun lahz. Wheeee~ And bully Fei He Ma so fun =) Hahahha.
Happy belated birthday to brenda and yue seng! Haha i almost forgot. =p
Wah lao! I wanna get sun tanned but got sun burned instead. =( So sad lahz! And we taupok sebastian on the sand after he got sun burned =p Hahaha. So fun!! Einstein with his freaky brain only comes out with freaky things. Too bad i can't take the picture with my handphone, if not i can post it here. Kinda gross tho =/
KFC for dinner, then accompany isaac go clinic for face treatment. Then now, blogging. Going roller blading next next tuesday! Wheee~ I'm so excited!! =)
