^{Monday, November 14, 2005}

Okay! This gonna be my longest bitching composition so far. So whoever don't wanna hear me bitching. Sorry, pls go other sites =) Wheeee~ And i'm shocked! 5 POSTS WITHIN A DAY LAHZ! Hahaha. Didn't know how come i'll write all this crappy post.


Okay. I can't sleep now and i just remember that while i was sleeping today. I don't know is which youth leader called me to talk about the aloha chalet thingy. Haha okay, and i remembered that i told him/her to meet this tuesday 6pm. But i really FORGOT is who!! Hahaha. Die die. Well, confession time. Bringing wine to chalet is bad example to christians. But well, its a habit. I got to drink some before i can sleep peacefully. So sorry eh? Hard to change. Coz i love wine. =) I'm so damn sure that once my birthday passed, my house will always have at least 2 big class bottle of wine. And einstein, i didn't get drunk that day. Stop insisting that i've got drunk before. I'll never get drunk like xy can? I know my own limit.


Somebody asked me some interesting questions today. And its very interesting, "have u taken advantage of girls before?" Ahhh, what a nice question. Sorry yea, i'm a flirty but i won't take advantage of girls! By accident, only once. But just HUG someone after she got drunk okay! Nothing more nothing less. And do i look like someone who will take advantage of girls? I don't know. I really don't know. But AT LEAST i'm NOT LIKE SOME GUY WHO ALWAYS STICK WITH YOU AND TAKE ADVANTAGE OF YOU! WE ALL CAN SEE THAT CAN? ITS SO DAMN FREAKING OBVIOUS. For those who don't know who i am refering to. Too bad. Well, you asked, why am i so agitated isn't it? Know why? Because i didn't expecting anything from anyone. What i am doing all along is just doing what friends should do. I didn't expect you to come to me and tell me your problem yea? I just want you to know that if you really need someone, i'll be there, AS A FRIEND. And the main reason i got so agitated is because you asked me some ridiculous questions. Fine, i didn't expect anyone who knows me will understand me anyway. Till now, not even one knows what i dislike most. And that is lieing. WHEN YOU WILL BE LATE, JUST ONE CALL OR SMS WILL DO IT! WHEN U DISLIKE ME, JUST SAY! I don't even knows whats the point of lieing to me when i will forgive if you told me the truth. Telling the truth right from the start is much damn more better then finding it out myself isn't it? Damn it.


And i said that this will be the longest bitching composition isn't it? Yea, i haven't finish yet. Theres so freaking much things for me to say about! Okay, second thing. I know some of you guys out there doesn't like me. I showing off my money? Sorry, i tell you one thing. YOU GUYS OUT THERE ARE SO FREAKING HAVING A GOOD LIFE OKAY? WHAT ABOUT ME? MY PARENTS DIVORCED AND MY FAMILY DOESN'T EVEN LOOK LIKE A FAMILY! AND I'M NOT SHOWING OFF MY MONEY, YOU THINK I'M RICH? ONE DAY I NEED TO EAT THREE MEALS OUTSIDE AND MY DAILY ALLOWANCE IS JUST $10? HOW ABOUT YOU GUYS OUT THERE? YOUR ALLOWANCE MIGHT NOT BE AS MUCH AS ME, BUT THE LEAST YOUR FAMILY WILL COOK ISN'T IT? I CAN'T EVEN SAVE MONEY CAN? THE MOST I CAN DO IS TO SKIP MY MEAL TO SAVE MONEY! SO SHUT THE HELL UP WHEN YOU DOESN'T EVEN KNOW HOW I FEEL!!! YOU THINK I'M HAVING A GOOD LIFE EH? I HAVE A SCREWED LIFE CAN? I FEEL NO WARM AT HOME. I GOT FREEDOM, BUT COMPARING FREEDOM AND FAMILY, WHAT WILL YOU CHOOSE? DAMN IT! Okay, my second bitching IS NOT REFERING to anyone. If you get offended, sorry.


Okay, third thing. Its related to christians, so i need to declear something first. I AM A CHRISTIAN ALSO! What i'm saying is the truth, so don't get offended. Again, i'm not refering to anyone and if you have a feeling saying like you will get offended, pls go other sites now. Well, what is god's teaching? Love your neighbour as yourself, love you god with all your mind and all your heart and all you strength. Are we doing all this? Do we love our neighbour? I don't really think so. Do you really love god, mostly yes. But WHEN will you really depend on him? When you have problems and no people to rely on eh? And forget him the next minute after your problem solve isn't it? This called faithful christians? Think about it. We keep on saying, we must be a good testimonal for god. But are some of us obeying the law? Lets say smoking and drinking first. Some of us included me are drinking when we are below 18! Then smoking? So many smokers! I had to admit, in church christians are so "HOLY". Outside church, DEVILS! Bunch of Hypocrites! I'm one also. No doubt. We prayed for changes! But are we really sincere about it? Or we pray because other people are doing it so we follow? A advice, if you are not sincere in your prayer! THEN PRAY TO GOD TO CHANGE YOUR FAITH FIRST! If not, you are forever a hypocrite, no matter how much effort you put in trying to act as a faithful christian, you are one hypocrite. Okay i don't want to say about christians anymore, i'm starting to feel ashame of christians after writing all this.


Okay, last bitching paragraph! Wheeee~ Promise matters. How do you guys treat promises as? Seriously, its just a random sentance that comes out of your mouth isn't it? None of us treat it as something important. Promise.. Do you know what is promise!? It is only said when u truely mean it, not just a random sentance. Hope you guys out there understands. People expecially guys who only know how to make empty promises, better reflect yourself on this. People hates empty promises.


Well, i've finish my bitching today. Wheeeee~ Feel so much better after writing so many things. Going sleep now. Exams later =) One hour of writing the blog. Nice ^^